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Parting Words

This is Andrew, Katie’s husband. It is with deep sadness that I share that Katie succumbed to her cancer on Saturday, August 20, 2016 at 10:24am. She was surrounded by her family, with her right till the end, and said how at peace with dying she was. She wrote this, to be posted after she died.

“If you are reading this it means that my body has ceased to be of use to me anymore and I have decided it’s time to move on. These are the words, the ideas and the thoughts that I would like to leave with you on this occasion.

Please give yourself permission to feel everything you need to feel right now and pretty much always. Cry, scream, dance, whatever strikes you. I mean, I was pretty awesome so I really don’t blame you for being pretty dang sad. But just know that there is no one way, no right way, no better way to “do” grief. However you feel the need to grieve today and in the weeks, months, and years ahead, is good and right.

As you grieve please know that I both loved the hell out of my life and also felt at peace with my passing. Life, like so many things, is much better measured in quality and not quantity and from those standards I lived just about all the life there was to live. I experienced so many wonderful things on this beautiful planet, I had such deep and meaningful love in my life and I got to go on quite an adventure of self-discovery. I truly regret nothing and am grateful for everything. I wouldn’t trade my life in, cancer and all, for anything. It’s been a great privilege to have lived this spectacular life.

I have a few favors to ask of you: First, please take good care of my husband. It was supposed to be my job but now I must hand it off to you and the universe. He is incredibly capable but please do give him all the space he needs for as long as he lives to grieve in the way he needs and to find a way to live with me in his life in this new way. He has been the best partner, husband, and best friend that I could have asked for. I will never stop loving him and will never stop being in his life. I ask that anyone who loved me, now share your love with him.

Second, please do the same for my parents, my brother and sister-in-law and my closest friends: Meredith and Jacob, the Baeckeroots and everyone else who has been near and dear to me in this life. I have been so lucky to have been raised with such love. I have such wonderful memories of my childhood and I couldn’t have asked for more loving parents or a more devoted little brother. I also could not have asked for better friends. They too will find a way to create a new life with this new relationship I will continue to have with them. Please be patient and kind and loving along the way.

Third…”

That was as far as she got. While I’m sure she intended to finish her post, I would suggest that for each person reading, based on your relationship with Katie, fill in the blank for yourself. Katie was so deeply full of love for all of her friends, family, and colleagues, that I know she would want to deliver an honest, loving, and heartfelt individual message to each one of you. We will miss her deeply, and love her forever, and are so thankful for the time we had with her. As she said, it was about quality, not quantity. We’ll have more to share in time.